hmpf: Cole and Ramse from the show not actually called "Splinter" (depressed)
[personal profile] hmpf
9:00 arrival

9:30 start of exam

9:35 Hmpf stares at exam questions, can't think of a single answer

9:45 Hmpf still can't think of anything

9:50 Hmpf writes down two words. Then stares at her piece of paper some more.

9:55 Hmpf has sudden panic attack; is brought glass of water

10:00 Hmpf feels terribly embarrassed due to breaking out in tears in class

10:05 Hmpf tries to breathe calmly

10:10 Hmpf scribbles down some more notes

10:30 Hmpf starts answering a question

11:15 Hmpf starts answering a second question

12:00 Hmpf decides to forget about the third question although there's still half an hour left, as her mind is completely blank. Hands in her exam book with an embarrassing total of five pages of, mostly, waffling. Then goes to see lecturer to enquire about mark for essay that makes up 50 percent of the final grade, to find out if she may still pass the module even though she probably failed the exam. Is told that yes, maybe. Depends on how badly she failed the exam. Hmpf suggests she failed very badly. Lecturer looks vaguely shocked, then suggests that this is something that 'happens to mature students' - they get out of practice.

---


I feel so stupid. Although of course it really only is a matter of practice. I have simply forgotten how to do this, prepare for an exam. Forgotten how to *study*. I still know it in theory, but for some reason I can't *do* it anymore. I might be able to relearn it, but then, in Germany I won't need it. Not this kind of studying, anyway.

A shame that this was the only one of my exams I really cared about. There's another one on Saturday next week, but that's sort of less important 'cause I probably won't be able to get it accredited in Germany, anyway. This one was the only one that really mattered.

Of course, I knew that. I knew that, and still didn't work efficiently. I knew all along what was going to happen. I've been talking about it for weeks. Although perhaps I didn't really believe it could happen to me. *I* don't fail exams...

I suppose in the light of 'try everything once', it was a valuable experience.

Date: 2004-05-25 01:11 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dunkle-feuer.livejournal.com
I'm glad you feel better now! How did your exam go? And how's your essay coming along?

I'm so happy that you like the CD. It's my current duty in life to spread the joy that is MM and NIN *g* They are both so very good. Now, if they would just hurry and bring their new albums out, I'd be a very happy fan. I tell you, being a NIN fan teaches you at least patience. Over five years since their last record ...

Congratulations to another story! Being creative is good! And at least you are writing, which is even more important than finishing something, IMO. But I'm probably not one to talk anyway, seeing how many projects I have going on at the same time and what for a hard time I have to finish something (though, despite all problems I had with the end, I just finished another one, well, at least the first draft :-)). Well, and even if I finished something, there's no guarantee that it will get posted any time soon, not even if I managed to send it to my beta and got it back. It seems, as soon as I finished a story, I lose interest.

Ah well, that's life *g* I just have too many ideas as that I could 'waste' too much time on an already finished project :-)

But your new story sounds intriguing. I love the title, too. After all, it is what John basically is, even if he never willingly chose to become either. I look forward to read it whenever you feel comfortable sharing it!

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