I should add:

[hmpf]

the biggest "brain freeze factor" in the previous glimpse into my psyche is the "social stuff" - I can make reasonably good To Do lists for things like fixing my bike and doing the dishes, but I'm unable to handle my social life in a similar manner. (Also, the unfixed bike - which tends to come at the bottom of my To Do list and so has remained unfixed for, err, years *is ashamed* - does not cause me anywhere near the constant emotional anguish that my neglected friends do.) So, since I can't handle social life properly, instead I kind of don't handle it at all, drifting further and further away from everyone I care about. Which sucks and makes me and - probably - everyone involved unhappy.

I'm afraid of taking this particular problem to a therapist, though, because I'm afraid the therapist would tell me to decide which people I "*really* care about", and essentially ditch all the others. Because I care about *all* of them, and while there are a handful of people I feel closest to (an emotional fact which, by now, is not actually founded on any kind of "real" fact anymore, as I don't see or talk to any of these people on a regular basis), I would not want to lose the rest, either.

Except of course I'm currently losing everyone.

Comments

[stabbim.livejournal.com]

Except of course I'm currently losing everyone.

That's probably true. You have to start somewhere. Just because you're closer to some people, doesn't mean you'll have to ditch the rest. Focus on some people, and you'll find that it'll get easier to keep in touch with the rest, too. It just takes practice and time, really.

If you can't quite work it out yourself, there's no shame to take this to a therapist. He'll help you to keep your friends, so you won't lose them, but you'll have make start somewhere.

(((Hmpf)))

[(Anonymous)]

Stabbim is right and now my English funktioniert nicht mehr. Und sei Dir sicher: das Licht am Ende des Tunnels sind nicht die Scheinwerfer des entgegenkommenden Zuges sondern die Kerzen und Taschenlampen Deiner Freunde.
Alles Liebe von K. (die nur selten weiß wo ihr der Kopf steht)

[beccatoria.livejournal.com]

You haven't lost me. :)

And I second Stabbim's suggestion. Sure, it's imperfect in an imperfect world and no one likes having to choose, but...even if I'm not one of those dudes (which obviously I'd love to be, but that's not my call and the last thing I wanna do is add stress; my email address isn't changing and I don't have a sell-by date), maybe try picking a few to get in touch with and just...see how it goes.

Perhaps if you remove the stress and guilt of feeling like you have to keep in touch in this regimented fashion, or you have to reply to this quote of posts and replies...perhaps that will help? Perhaps if you don't feel you have to go back and catch up with all of LJ but are just allowed to start commenting on newer entries?

Ultimately, you are capable of being in touch with as many people as you want to be, as frequently as you want to be, even if you don't feel that that's true right now, even if, for whatever reason (stress, I suspect?) you don't want to be in touch with that many people right now.

*hugs*

P.S. With apologies, I still haven't mailed the DVDs to you - this is cus the front cover of one of them was messed up and I want to reprint it, but I have to wait for my Dad to get another colour cartridge for the printer, etc., etc., etc., and he keeps saying he will but hasn't yet. Anyway, it should go out to you some time in the next week and I'll drop you a line when it does. :)

[dswdiane.livejournal.com]

I am a psychotherapist, and I don't think your therapist should tell you do anything. Part of the job of being a therapist is to help you decide what you, yourself, want to do.

I know you and I have very little contact, and that is really okay with me. I enjoy reading your entries in LJ, and I almost never make any, so as I see we're a couple of introverts who occasionally connect. Is way okay with me.

I hope your therapist helps you to figure our what you want to do for yourself.