Explain American customs to me!

[hmpf]

1.) Thanks for the birthday greetings, and sorry I didn't reply earlier (probably won't today, either, as I'm really tired and will probably go to bed right after posting this admittedly fairly pointless entry) - I was actually not at home and hence without internet access for most of last week, and have been struggling to catch up with Stuff since. (I was visiting relatives up north. Yes, I did take some of my m.a. work with me.)

2.) Sometimes I come across odd English/American phenomena or customs in my internet reading; when something puzzles me, I tend to do some research - this is how I found out about the meaning of things like "baby shower", and "cooties", and other stuff that a dictionary won't explain properly because there's no equivalent.

So, over the last few days I've repeatedly encountered the phrase "back-to-school shopping". After some research, I am now more puzzled than I was before: it seems like a kind of ritual, and a largely nonsensical one, to me. Do Americans *actually* do this, in a kind-of-ritualised way? And is what I read of the shopping lists distributed by schools actually true? Do they really include things like zip-loc bags and sanitising wipes? Paper plates? *Disposable cameras*??? *75* pencils???? Not to mention the fact that apparently new clothes are expected for the first day of school after the holidays, and in many cases also a new backpack/school bag??? Some environmental websites I'm visiting occasionally were giving advice on back-to-school shopping, presenting the idea of *not* buying your child a new backpack/bag as something revolutionary and new... (this is actually what inspired me to do some research on the phenomenon of 'back-to-school shopping' in the first place - I couldn't quite believe that bit of advice; it felt like a joke.)

I have to admit I'm completely boggled. Is this a fair representation of the state of affairs, or is it an internet/media distortion? Help me, out, Americans on my flist!

Comments

[skywaterblue.livejournal.com]

Drive by from friends-friends: yes, it's completely real. You are free to ignore the lists, since everyone knows they're often overhyped and wrong, except on school supplies where often the teachers will get irritated if you DON'T have the items. (Especially in upper grades.)

The dumber items like baggies and paper plates are usually found on the lists that have been co-opted by some corporate sponsor and NOT distributed by your teacher themselves.

There is some effort made to remember that not everyone has disposable income, and no one makes too much fun if you bring obviously old supplies. (By which I mean pencils and notebooks and paper.)

School children have a ritual (right up to college) of comparing/contrasting their new stuff at the beginning of the term. Kids who are obviously in hand-me-downs or less new stuff get teased mercilessly. (But remember, we don't have class in America!!!) The stuff that gets teasing is old clothes and shoes, and old backpacks. It's very important to keep up on the newest backpack styles of the season.

Edited: to explain the difference in supplies.

[ithildyn.livejournal.com]

I went to school in both the US and Canada -- though quite a while ago. The list of required school supplies my mum got a list for was twice as long in Canada as it was when I went to school here. And yes, every fall, since most stuff didn't make it to the next year. It would get stolen, lost, worn out, or something else was required the next year. As for clothes, most of us outgrew our fall/winter clothes from the year before, so yeah, we had to get new stuff. Unless you had an older brother or sister and were made to wear hand me downs. Even in the schools I wore uniforms, I'd grow out of the last year's and need new ones. I didn't have lots of clothes for that very reason! :)

The paper plates and wet wipes are news to me though. We had to get things like pens, pencils, coloured pencils, notebooks, binders, paints, rulers.

[exorcizo-te.livejournal.com]

Very much real, but some of that you have listed seems extreme. Usually it's just pencils/pens, folders, notebooks, glue, rulers, crayons, etc. Stuff you'll actually use in the classroom. New backpacks were usual - if only because the ones they make for kids often are looking ragged and/or falling apart by the end of the year. (Aside even from the ones that might go "out of style" because they've got a cartoon character on them.) A new lunch box, usually - again, the ones we bought tended to fall apart by the end of the year. We'd usually get a few new outfits (1-3). You'd wear a new outfit the first day of school.

The practice seemed to be more involved in our elementary school (ages 6-11). In middle school and high school (12-18), it was mostly just notebooks, pencils/pens, notepads, and clothes. Maybe a new backpack/lunchbox if ours from the last year was unusable.

It's an exciting ritual when we were kids (6-10). We got new stuff - it was one of the few times a year we did (the others being our birthdays and christmas). When we got older, it was less exciting and more of a chore.

But specifically?

Do Americans *actually* do this, in a kind-of-ritualised way? Yes. In a very-ritualized way.


And is what I read of the shopping lists distributed by schools actually true? Do they really include things like zip-loc bags (no) and sanitising wipes? (no) Paper plates? (no) *Disposable cameras*??? (no)*75* pencils???? (no)

This is a more common kind of list: http://www.greatschools.net/cgi-bin/showarticle/ca/327

Not to mention the fact that apparently new clothes are expected for the first day of school after the holidays, and in many cases also a new backpack/school bag??? (Yes)

Some environmental websites I'm visiting occasionally were giving advice on back-to-school shopping, presenting the idea of *not* buying your child a new backpack/bag as something revolutionary and new... (Yep - revolutionary and new. Most people get them every year.)

[mikes-grrl.livejournal.com]

Seconded. Even back when I was in public grade school (what, 7 years old?) back in the 70s, this was very much an annual ritual. To NOT buy a new backpack for school...whoa. UNTHINKABLE. And even then schools sent home lists, although they were a lot simpler back then.

Part of it is cost; schools CANNOT AFFORD SUPPLIES FOR THE STUDENTS. So the parents are expected to make up for it, purchasing the crayons and craft paper and the, er, disposable cameras that the schools can't afford. The worst part? Kids whose parents cannot afford and/or do not buy the supplies? Well that's why lists are bloated (75 pencils) so that the overflow can be shared. Otherwise the TEACHER has to buy the supplies, sometimes out of their own pockets.

Sad.

[starwatcher]

.
Basically what the others said. Yes, "back-to-school shopping" is common, though the details will vary with the community and/or region of the country.

New clothes right before school -- parents are trying to make the clothes last till the end of the school year, hoping the children don't grow too much. So, even if a child needs new shirts, say, in July, he's likely to simply wear the faded / too small / whatever-is-wrong-with-it shirt until just before school starts.

School supply lists will, again, vary by school and grade. Most are school items (paper, crayons, pencils). Our school, for instance (first grade - 6 years old) requires each child bring two boxes of tissues (as well as the more school-based stuff). This way, the teacher has enough tissue to put on her desk for all the runny noses.

Yes, it is a big expense for the poorer families, especially if they have several children. In my state (New Mexico), the weekend before school starts is tax-free shopping. Depending on the town, the parents can save from 6% to 9% on their total costs by not having to pay 'sales tax'. And we have an annual 'school supplies drive' (like a food drive) for people to donate school supplies for families who still can't afford to buy everything.

I don't see yearly new backpacks around here but, as I said, many of our families are from lower socio-economic levels. It may be (probably is) very different in other parts of the country.

So, yeah, the idea of staring out fresh and new for each new school year is well-entrenched in American society. How it's implemented, and to what degree, is by no means standard; the details can differ significantly.
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[torn-eledhwen.livejournal.com]

You've never been in France at this time of year then? The whole country goes mad for la rentrée, and all the supermarkets stock up with bags and stationery and clothes. It's hideous.

[beccatoria.livejournal.com]

In britain we have "back to school" sales in shops and stuff, but we don't get those crazy long lists you're talking about, nor am I aware of them. I mean, we might get some suggestions like, "make sure you have a bookbag, a pencil case, you need a calculator for math class," but...that's about it.

The main reason it always felt to me that it's a Big Thing is that for the majority of school children are still growing. You're probably going to have to replace most of their clothes once a year, and the start of a new year is the most logical place to do so? Speaking for myself, I didn't used to get brand new clothes once I was older if my old ones still fit and I used to get new shoes when my old shoes broke, not In September Or Bust, and I kept the same backpack for years as did many of my friends, so that seems to be a difference, or perhaps that was a welsh school / english school difference? I dunno.

Point is, it's a phenomenon in the UK but apparently nothing like on par with the US (though this is the first I've heard of this craziness, but then again, I never went Back To School there). In the UK it's generally considered a chance to put on a sale at your store because harried parents are suddenly realising Little Jimmy has grown out of all his school shirts or trying to bribe Little Sally not to be quite so upset about going back after the summer holidays because LOOK we will get you a NEW PENCILCASE.

But paper plates?! Yeah...no.

[jazzymegster.livejournal.com]

(also in the UK)

I'd never heard of those lists, either. Like, whut? (Those Americans are craaazeeee).

With you on the not changing your bags/clothes/shoes till you needed them (although some kids did, but my family was one of those ones without disposable income. I was probably a slow grower once I got into my teens, too).

[(Anonymous)]

It really depends on the community, whether it's a public or private school, the age of the child, and what classes s/he is taking.

I went to public schools and our community was pretty diverse and mostly made up of the middle/lower class. For the most part, the lists are simple and are only suggesting what the child would need. You can use last year's backpack, binder, etc. if they are still in usable condition. There was never any mention of new clothes, though there is teasing for kids wearing hand-me-downs, even in elementary school.

My boss has a son in private school though and I've seen his school supplies list. They did have an extraordinary amount of pencils in the list. Even when I was in elementary school, no one needed that many pencils in one year. There was also the option of $90 for a prepared box of school supplies from the school. My boss took that option.

I think it seems ritualized because everyone waits for the back-to-school sales to buy their school supplies and retailers know this and advertise it like it's a holiday sale and so it kinda gets blown out of proportion. It doesn't help that because it's so last minute, parents crowd stores and sometimes also have to bring the kids along and everyone jostles for what they need. It's comparable to the stress of last minute Christmas shopping.

They're just buying what the child will need for the school year in one long shopping trip to save money. I remember my mom buying 10 packs of looseleaf paper every year (I have 3 siblings who are close to my age) because it was on sale that way.

Even in high school, there were lists of required and suggested supplies. These depend on the teachers. They don't want the kids to come to class unprepared. I've seen other kids going to class with only a notebook rolled up in their back pockets and maybe a pen. A lot of people borrow pens and pencils.

Maybe they're trying to idiot-proof the lists? Schools frown on certain clothes and some might be trying to curtail what kids can wear by including them on the lists.

There's also gym clothes. Even in public schools, they're required and the parents have to pay for them.

[scotschik.livejournal.com]

In my part of Canada, we were given lists of school supplies we would need from the teacher each year until around grade6 (~12yo), after that students were trusted to know and get what they needed. The main reasoning for lists was that the schools themselves weren't provided with the budgets to supply classrooms with all the kit that would be needed (very sad but true) and if students didn't get the stuff the teacher would have to, usually with their own money.

I've never heard of needing paper plates/cameras etc, but I wouldn't be totally surprised, as it seems there is a national fixation with hygiene.

New back to school outfits are pretty common, but they were never mandated by the schools, more just a desire to 'look nice' on the first day. I'm not so sure about backpacks though, I only ever got a new one when the old one couldn't take any more.

[cathexys.livejournal.com]

Also, one thing that you might want to remember is the fact that the summer break is 3 months + long so that kids may have outgrown their clothes (or rather, I tend to not buy new school uniforms late in the school year, because they won't be used those three months and then easily may be too small come fall).

FWIW, my kids in private school actually don't have a back to school list. Instead, they just charge us a hefty sum and the kids get all their supplies for the year the first day of classes (whatever's not used by the end of the year is sent home)

Also, I do remember moderate back to school shopping when I was growing up--definitely all the school books, but also new notebooks etc.

[nogias.livejournal.com]

This has been playing for about a month now on televisions nation-wide.

[pink-bagels.livejournal.com]

I have two kids in grade school at present, and yes the lists are real. I am in Canada, and as some others have said, the school budgets no longer cover for paper, pencils, pens, etc., and these have to be purchased seperately. Lined, three hole-punched paper is at its cheapest at this time of year as well, and yes, new backpacks are usually *needed*--By the time the school year ends and the backpacks have survived the ravages of both a Canadian winter and spring, they are pretty much rags by June.

We also have two months of summer holidays, a concept begun because historically children would help on the farms during planting and harvesting months and their labour was needed. (Though we've obviously become far more urbanised, I do live in an area where this is still a common practise :P). With lots of exercise, sunlight and an abundance of in-season foods, I know my own children have growth spurts, and few of their clothes fit by September. Starting the school year with at least one new outfit to wear the first day to school is kind of a nice tradition, really. I guess it's like acknowledging that as a student you are one year ahead in your studies and are fresh to approach what is to be learned in the new year.