What the f....?

Okay... apparently I have a fan. Proof: http://thawrecka.sphosting.com/recs/r-hp.html

I am thrilled. No, really, I am. I used to believe no one but one or two people I'd basically begged to had read that story. And I've only been recced twice before in my life (once for that selfsame story above, and once, way back when, for Sometimes We Believe, in HL fandom), so I'm naturally very excited now.

But why the f... do people not see the necessity of telling authors that they're being recced? I mean, hey... yeah, I know, I don't always give feedback either, so that's cool... but putting a link up on your website and writing:

"This is heartbreaking Sirius/Remus set during OotP that actually makes me cry. It really gives the sense of the past pressing in on them, and the whole thing is so true to canon."

is quite something different. I'd like to *know* when someone does that! Not that I *mind* being recced, hell no... But I want to know when I make people cry! Call me self-centred, call me obsessed with fame, call me pathetic, call me whatever you like - but frell, *tell* me when I make you cry!!!!!!!! (Maybe just call me a sadist. *g*)

Hezmana.

Anyway... thank you, whoever you are. I do appreciate it. I feel loved. I would feel even more loved if you'd told me, but hey...

Heh... based on the amount and quality of feedback that is my most popular story by far. How ironic - my greatest success happened in a fandom I don't usually write. *g*

(Edited to add: There may seem to be a contradiction here, since I claimed, above, that no one but a few people I had begged to read it had read that story. It's true, I have had more feedback for other stories. However, those were posted to boards, and on boards you generally get a lot more feedback than you get for stuff on your own website. This is literally my only story that has managed not only to get feedback but to get recommended with *zero* publicity from my side. Wow.)

Edited to add: I think to celebrate my first appearance on a recs page (the other recs were informal ones on lists and on LJ) I will finally revise the story according to ballyharnon's very kind beta tomorrow. There are a few things in there that should be corrected...

Thank you...

all you nice people who have been replying to my posts recently. You're keeping me from my work, but in the nicest possible way. ;-)

I will have to work harder in the next few days, but I really enjoy all the discussion going on here. So, thank you. (hugs)

Odd...

I'm looking at logfiles again (while I'm eating, but I'll go back to work in a moment), and apparently my most 'popular' story, in terms of hits, is "Flaking Paint"/"Rock Bottom" (both are working titles), with 39 hits a month at rank 8 of all pages of my website. Incidentally that is also a story I got the last (make that only) feedback for (again, except for when posting bits of it on forums) in early 2000 or so (started writing in 1999). It is, in terms of accomplishment, very much one of my worse efforts - hey, it was my first attempt at fanfic! It is also not at the top of the list on my writing page, so it's unlikely people will click it first, I think. Oh, and it's unfinished.

So, why the many hits, I wonder? There are two possible explanations, I think. First the pessimistic one: for unfathomable reasons it *is* the first story that most people read, and they decide they don't like my writing based on that, and leave my page, hence the few hits for other stories.
The optimistic interpretation? Those 39 hits, or a few of them, are people who read the story (what there is of it), liked it, and keep checking back, occasionally, to see if it's been updated. Hmm.

Second most popular story according to hits is Together, with 23 hits a month. Followed by Sometimes We Believe (16 hits), Names (13), Endure and Rise and Shine (both 11), This is your Time (9) - damn, people are still reading that? I should take it down. *shudder* - Epilogue and Zusammen (8), and A River in Egypt (7).

Those are the stats for February, but they're more or less consistent, with some variation in the lower ranks, with those for January.

And, speaking of ego surfing... I just checked fanfiction.net for the first time in months, and the girl who thought Rise and Shine was a comedy put me on her author alert list. Wellllllll..... Actually, she may even be sort of confirmed in her misperception by the next part of that series (if I'm ever going to finish it), because the next one *is* meant to be a bit more comical. Which is why I seem to be unable to write it. Can't do comedy. (Unless, apparently, accidentally.)

Transcripts...

carenejeans has been posting some fascinating panels transcripts from Escapade, a slash con with a high meta factor. They have a certain disjointed quality as they were typed 'in real time', but they contain some very intriguing food for thought and some of that sort of ties in with some of the things I've been thinking about publicly here in my LJ and all over some other people's LJs recently. (I think I'm beginning to get that whole hive mind thing...) The connections are largely in my mind, but anyway, read those transcripts, discuss them, have fun:

Here's one about kinks and squicks; and one titled "Slashing the Slashers" Especially the latter one is fascinating in terms of what it says about fannish sexuality (and that's where it sort of ties in with what I've been thinking about for the last three weeks or so).

Ooops, just noticed that she now has *all* the transcripts up. There's a whole load of them, so just head over to carenejeans's journal and read and discuss to your heart's content.