Why does my brain shut down when I try to work on uni stuff?

And not just my brain - whenever I *try* to work on anything even remotely 'important', I *immediately* get *physically* tired - can't concentrate, eyes are burning, eyelids drooping, limbs feeling heavy... also, I'm freezing, which at 24 degrees Celsius is just a *tad* odd. And it's been like that for weeks. Months.

Anyone know that feeling?

Just for the record: *Really* about to finish the two essays/papers/thingies now; one of them is total crap, but I don't care. That one also happens to be six months overdue, so chances are the prof won't accept it anymore, anyway. The other one's about three weeks overdue and slightly better. Also, I have a *really important* exam on Wednesday for which I should have done *massive* amounts of revision, yet I haven't done *anything* yet (reasons: see above). I mean, I haven't even *opened* a book yet. Tomorrow I don't have time to do any revision because I have classes followed by work; can't skip classes because I skipped them last week already because I was feeling quite ill (and frantically trying to finish my papers/essays/thingies, as well); can't skip work, either - they're not that flexible there, and I *do* need the job. Tuesday I can't do much revision either, because I have classes again, again followed by work. So I'll probably fail that exam. I may be fairly smart, but I do need to revise before exams.

And, you know, failing that exam isn't the end of the world because I can try again, but it *will* set me back another semester I can't really afford. Then again, I *should* have finished a third 20-page essay by now already, anyway, *and* gotten the topics for yet another two, and I haven't even been able yet to drag myself to classes...

Friend of mine with experience in psychological crises says I should go and see a doctor, get a note that I'm having a bit of a crisis and can't have that exam right now. But then, I figure, I don't really have much to lose by sitting it - I mean, the worst that can happen is that I'll fail, and, as I said, while vaguely embarrassing, that's hardly the end of the world. And if I *do* manage to somehow scrape through, then that will be one more hurdle taken.

Maybe I'll get a doctor's note yet try for the exam anyway. Hmm.

Still freezing.

I've decided I don't care what the thermometer says, and put on a pair of tights under my jeans, some warm wool socks, a long-sleeved shirt, and a turtleneck sweater over that, and my warmest wool sweater over *that*, and a scarf. I'd put on gloves, too, if I could handle typing with them.

All of this doesn't really help with the brain issue, though. It still keeps shutting down every five minutes.

Essays still not finished, feel like shit, but at least...

I'm warm now. The two extra layers of clothes really helped. Even my hands are warm now, and they *never* are, when I'm at the computer! It's a miracle! Maybe I should *always* wear this much stuff at the computer!

***

I'm wondering... where's the difference between laziness and a real psychological crisis? *Is* there an excuse for the way I'm failing at basically everything right now, or am I just trying to dress up my insufficiencies as something less embarrassing?

***

The sad thing is, I could be *done* with the essays by now. I would have been able to go to bed now. There isn't that much more to do on them, just check some footnotes and choose a couple of illustrations. It's ridiculous, really. If I'd actually been able to *focus* on working, without my mind beginning to drift immediately upon maximising the window and looking at the text, I'd be done now.

Ya sick of this yet? Poetry fic evolution, stage four.

I said it would go in the drawer now, but, I dunno. Just needed to do something less frustrating than checking footnotes on Slovakian archaeology for a quarter of an hour or so, so I took the machete to my poem-fic-thingie. This is the result:

( LOM 2.08 spoilers, as before )

(There should be a special word for that uneasy feeling you get when you read your own writing and a bit of it just sort of sticks out and nags at you because it doesn't quite work yet.)

(Edited to remove some more words.)

(Edited for yet another minor change.)