Yay.

[hmpf]

So, it seems my exams are finals, which apparently means they are not repeatable, i.e. if (when) I fail, I fail. Great. I wonder if there's any chance that the essays I have written will be accredited in Germany even without the exams? After all, we don't *have* exams like that in Germany.

Probably not, though, as the essays are all a lot shorter than what is usual in Germany. So, most likely, I have actually wasted a year here, from a university perspective. Unless I somehow manage not to fail the frelling finals.

Why the frell did I have to procrastinate for five weeks?

Why the frell did I have to find a job in the last three weeks before exams? I guess I could quit, as there isn't a real contract and my employers know that I'm a busy student, but I sort of enjoy working there, and the money is nice, too...

Why the frell did I have to travel to Milton Keynes yesterday to meet a bunch of people? Well, because I thought it would be very nice to meet that bunch of people, and it *was*, but I am really afraid I will fail the frelling exams now.

Oh, frell. Why am I so stupid? All of this could have been avoided if I hadn't been so lazy in the frelling holidays. If I had done any work then, I would have been able to pass the exams, get a job, *and* travel without problems now. Instead I waited until it was too late to do all three successfully.

It's also interesting that my first reaction to finding out that my exams are not repeatable was to go to bed and sleep for five hours - five hours which I could have used for studying.

I haven't eaten anything today, either. Too stressed out. (Plus, I slept - can't eat while sleeping.)

Comments

[ommadon.livejournal.com]

Now nobody gets anywhere through panicing :). Look at it this way, will worrying about the time which you could have spent preparing for the exams actually help with the situation at hand? Alternatively, will spending time now worrying about time which can't now be spent revising actually gain any of that lost time back? The past is behind you, nothing can be done to change it; as such I recommend that you stop worrying, take a deep breath and do as much work as the time remaining to you allows - you can't do better than that, and there's no point worrying about what might-have-been.

Keep a clear head and I'm sure you'll do fine :)

Subconscious wish?

[(Anonymous)]

When you present it like that I have a hard time believing that you don't have some kind of subconscious wish to fail those exams. Or, a little less extreme, maybe you don't really want to pass. You know, Tarot cards are the perfect means to communicate with your subconscious and find out the answers to questions such as these.

MSB